The Two Sons
March 3, 2013
Rev. Barry W. Szymanski, Minister of Pastoral Care
First Congregational Church of Wauwatosa

Luke 15:1-3, 11b-32

Now all the tax collectors and sinners were coming near to listen to Jesus. And the Pharisees and the scribes were grumbling and saying, ‘This fellow welcomes sinners and eats with them.’ So Jesus told them this parable: Jesus said, ‘There was a man who had two sons. The younger of them said to his father, “Father, give me the share of the property that will belong to me.” So the father divided his property between them. A few days later the younger son gathered all he had and traveled to a distant country, and there he squandered his property in dissolute living. When he had spent everything, a severe famine took place throughout that country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed the pigs. He would gladly have filled himself with the pods that the pigs were eating; and no one gave him anything. But when he came to himself he said, “How many of my father’s hired hands have bread enough and to spare, but here I am dying of hunger! I will get up and go to my father, and I will say to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me like one of your hired hands.’” So he set off and went to his father. But while he was still far off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion; he ran and put his arms around him and kissed him. Then the son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” But the father said to his slaves, “Quickly, bring out a robe—the best one—and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. And get the fatted calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate; for this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!” And they began to celebrate. ‘Now his elder son was in the field; and when he came and approached the house, he heard music and dancing. He called one of the slaves and asked what was going on. He replied, “Your brother has come, and your father has killed the fatted calf, because he has got him back safe and sound.” Then he became angry and refused to go in. His father came out and began to plead with him. But he answered his father, “Listen! For all these years I have been working like a slave for you, and I have never disobeyed your command; yet you have never given me even a young goat so that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came back, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fatted calf for him!” Then the father said to him, “Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and has come to life; he was lost and has been found.”’

SERMON

Malachy McCourt said: “Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Another way of looking at resentment was made by *Ann Landers. She wrote that: “Hanging onto resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head.” Catherine Ponder is a bit more serious in her assessment of resentment when she writes that: “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.”

I feel privileged to be able to talk about this parable, which Jesus presents to all of us. Jesus told stories, in part, because they are so easy to remember. Jesus could have preached on the many themes of this passage, but, instead, decided to tell it as an account of what happened to three people.

There are so many paths for a preacher to take with this story. I don’t want to be scattered in this message that you and I lose sight of any theme. What I want to stress is resentment. However we must examine the entire parable to get a handle on that theme – yet we must continue to strive to stay the course on resentment as the principal subject.

In this parable, the younger son insults his father. He asks, in advance, for what he will be inheriting once his father dies. Sometimes the death of parents is looked forward to by their children. Paula Poundstone, the comedienne, told her children that she wanted to be cremated, now has to keep telling them that they need to wait. Back to the younger son.

He really is telling his Dad that he is hoping that Dad is already dead so he can receive his inheritance – but since Dad is sadly still alive, he wants his inheritance now. In Mosaic Jewish law, according to Deuteronomy 21:15-17, written probably 1,300 years before Jesus was born, the second born is entitled to 1⁄2 of the inheritance of the firstborn.

Let’s give a modern example: If the father’s farm is 6,000 acres and the farm is worth $1,500,000, then the son who asks for his inheritance is demanding, and receives, $500,000. The father has to sell at least 2,000 acres and many farm animals to give his son the $500,000. If there is money in the bank, the prodigal son is entitled to 1/3 of that sum also! So the father sells 1/3 of what he owns.

In looking at a parable I try to place myself into the story Jesus told. If I were the younger son, I see myself as offensive and rude. But on further reflection I also realize that I am breaking one of the ten commandments of God! That commandment is that I am to honor my father and my mother. The commandment reads as follows: “Honor your father and your mother as the Lord your God commanded you, so that your days may be long and that it may go well with you in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. Deuteronomy 5:16

I am going to stress a section of that commandment, which we frequently gloss over: “Honor your parents, so that it may go well with you in the land….” The offensive younger son violates that commandment – by not honoring his STILL LIVING FATHER, and by disregarding the LAND of his ancestors. Land for the Jewish people was everything. For Moses was promised by God a ‘land of milk and honey.’

There is yet another part to this story. A very important part. And that is the options, which his father has. His father can simply refuse him his future inheritance. The father can disown him – which would give him with no inheritance.

Even worse, at that time, if his younger son was abusive to his father because his father had either refused him, or disowned him, then, Mosaic law, set out in Deuteronomy 21:18-21, gives this punishment: “If someone has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father and mother, who does not heed them when they discipline him, then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his town at the gate of that place.

They shall say to the elders of his town, ‘this son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us. He is a glutton and a drunkard.’ Then all the men of the town shall stone him to death.” The father does not exercise any of these options. Instead he sells off land and animals and gives the covetous younger son 1/3 of what he owns.

Again, I put myself in the place of that father. How would I feel if my daughter asks me for her inheritance this afternoon? First of all, there is not that much inheritance anyway, but, in spite of that, what there is still helps Sue and I to live. We would have to sell our condo. Our cat would not have two meals every day. I would only have two meals every day. Life would not be very comfortable in a pop-up trailer.

Back to the parable. Imagine what the first-born son was feeling seeing the family farm being sold off. We will get back to him. But I mention him in order to keep the resentment theme in our forefront. The crux of the story occurs after the younger son squanders his property in dissolute living.

The original King James Version of the Bible translates this passage to read thus: “and there [he wastes] wasted his substance with riotous living.” That is probably a better interpretation of what that greedy son did. The severe famine in that foreign land is the turning point for the son. When all is scarce in that far-off country, the materialistic younger son has no resources to rely on.

Just as he fails to plan when he demands his inheritance while his father is still alive, he also fails to plan for the future time when his money will be completely spent. Not only is he arrogant, he does not strategize or invest for the future. When the financial depression occurs, he has to find a job. This Jewish individual is forced to feed pigs. According to Mosaic dietary laws pigs are unclean animals. The law states: Deut 14:8 – “And the pig, because it divides the hoof but does not chew the cud, is unclean for you. You shall not eat their meat, and you shall not touch their carcasses.” Lev 11:7 – “The pig, for even though it has divided hoofs and is cloven-footed, it does not chew the cud; it is unclean for you.”

If you still have your Bibles open to Luke 15, look at verses 1-3: The tax-collectors and sinners were coming near to listen to Jesus. Their desire is to learn from this Jesus. But there were other people in the crowd: the Pharisees and the scribes; and they are grumbling. Why? They are upset because Jesus, who they call ‘This fellow’, welcomes sinners and eats with them.’ He has table fellowship with them!

With that in mind -- and the theme of resentment! -- picture these staunch observers of the Mosaic Law hearing that this avaricious younger son is feeding pigs! This is repulsive to them. The younger offensive son disobeys the commandment to honor his father – and now is detestable for caring for pigs. The younger son, now destitute, because ‘no one is giving him anything,’ decides to return home, and work as a hired hand at what remains of the family farm.

Now the father comes back into the picture, for when he sees his younger son, he hugs him, and kisses him, all with kindness and concern. The father hears his prodigal son call him father, and hears him confess that he has sinned against heaven, and against his father, and, in the future, he should not be called son.

The father will not let his son even get to the part where his son will serve as a hired hand. The compassionate father interrupts his son’s speech. He orders his servants to dress his son in the very best robe, and to place a ring on his finger, signifying family membership, and to put sandals on his feet, signifying class, and to grill the fatted calf, for the party, which is now in full force.

If you have your Bibles open, look at verse 24 in Chapter 15. This is what the father announces “'. . . this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!’ And they began to celebrate.” Jesus is talking about mercy, compassion, forgiveness, and grace. And we see, by his reappearance, a form of rebirth, and by his restoration, renewal.

Let’s return to the theme. The resentful older brother is not buying this lost/found, dead/alive-again thing. While the father is declaring that his younger son, is now safe, and sound, the older annoyed son has none of this.

Jesus says he is angry and he is not going to attend the party. The host father, contrary to culture, leaves the party pleading to his bitter son. The older son complains to his father, and reminds him that he has never broken any of the house rules and he never has been pampered like his greedy younger brother is being indulged.

Look at the language of the older resentful brother. He talks back to his father and refers to his younger brother as: “this son of yours.” However the father, in imploring with the indignant older son, turns the phrase back onto him, and calls the younger, now welcomed son, as “. . . this brother of yours.” The father reminds his devoted older son, that he knows that his son was always with him, and he assures his older son that all that the father owns is now his, but, at this time, celebrate, and rejoice, for your younger brother was lost -- and is now found.

Let’s back up a bit. We know that the younger son shamed the father. Yet the father throws a party for him. Now the older son is shaming his father! The father begs him to also accept that his younger brother is found and is alive. The father wants to raise and keep both sons in sonship! The father also wants his neighbors to accept his younger son as he did. But the older son remains resentful.

The older son may be resentful because his younger brother is arrogant, greedy, lustful, and wasteful. The older son may be resentful because his father was insulted by his younger brother, and, in spite of that, his father is loving and forgiving, and merciful. However, the older son, through his resentment of his brother, shows his own brand of arrogance, conceit, egotism, smugness, superiority, envy, anger, - and even naughtiness.

Yet, you and I somehow have a degree of empathy toward the older brother. Like the older brother, you and I strive to obey God’s commands. We work at being respectful of God’s commandments. We try to live prudently. In short, we generally work at being good. So we, like the older brother, also question why this greedy guy who returned from wasting the family money is now the center of a big lavish party? -- especially since we have been doing what we believe to be the right thing, and have not even been offered a small party with beer and popcorn?

We don’t know if the older son ever reconciled with his father or with his younger brother. We don’t know if the Pharisees and Scribes ever reconciled with the tax collectors and sinners. I speculate that if I put myself in the shoes of the older brother, would I be just as apt to be as arrogant, conceited, egoistic, smug, superior, envious, resentful, angry, and even as naughty?

I can look at this story and try to fool myself into believing that Jesus was only speaking to the Pharisees and Scribes --- and he really gave them a dressing down. But then I think of what Jesus said and I realize he is telling this parable to me.

I have yet another way to examine the older son’s resentment. He may be thinking that what is happening to him is not the way his life is supposed to be. The older brother could be considering that once his younger brother left with all of his father’s – and his - money, that his younger brother was dead – and that was ok. Now for his greedy brother to be back – and accepted, with fancy robes and dancing and food and a party, is just plain wrong. This is not the way his life is supposed to be – more resentment! We would hope that the older brother came to accept that his younger brother is back – in whatever role. We would hope that he did not hold a grievance.

Eric Hoffer wrote this line of sarcastic wisdom: “To have a grievance is to have a purpose in life.” “To have a grievance is to have a purpose in life.” Isn’t there a higher purpose in life other than to be indignant or feel that everything that is done to us is to be regarded as an insult, or injury, or affront? Even if something happens that is not intended, should we feel that we have been offended, or wronged? Is that what the older brother felt?

Dr. Paula Bloom, a currently practicing clinical psychologist, wrote this about resentment and forgiveness and the effect that both have on our emotional wellbeing: “Forgiveness is really a choice we make. If we wait for the feeling to fill our hearts, inspiring us to forgive, we could spend our lives waiting. It is a decision – a conscious decision.

While we don’t have control over events that occurred in the past, we have some say over what role those events play in our present. You may find that you may not necessarily feel immediately better after you forgive, but as with many things in life, action often precedes motivation.

Remember: Your mind is like a magnifying glass. Whatever you focus on will expand. Do you want to focus on resentment, or forgiveness? Which one, do you believe, will ultimately make you feel (and live) better?”

I leave the older brother, but return to the grumbling Pharisees and Scribes. Did they ‘get the message’ that Jesus wanted them to get? And, even though
I spent a lot of time over years reflecting on this passage, and I think that I ‘got the message’; I wonder if it has really sunk in? For when I hear what the younger son asks for, how would I respond? And when the younger son returns, how would I respond? Would I reject him? Would I allow him take care of the animals at the edge of the farm? Or never let him back in the farmhouse? Or force him to change his name? Or would I just resent him the rest of my days? This is a most powerful story.

If Jesus also wants us to make a parallel between the father of the prodigal son and God, the Divine Father, then, we will see God the Father’s mercy that he has for each of us. Then we who have sinned against God the Father can feel joy in God’s mercy, and God’s compassion, and let God hug and kiss us, and put a robe on us, as He accepts us as his sons and daughters – His children.

Amen.